Dangerous Toys That Should Have Killed Us

Boy Are Today's Kids Missing Out!

November 15, 2018

ID 5344385 © Richard Nelson | Dreamstime.com

A watch group has come out with its list of the most dangerous toys of 2018, and while they do include some questionable playthings, like a "Marvel Black Panther Slash Claw," they have nothing on the stuff we played with as kids. (See this year's list here).

Here are a few of the things that should have killed me but didn't.

1. Almost all playground equipment. I always heard wild tales of kids cracking their heads open falling off tall slides, towers made seemingly with the sole purpose of falling off, merry-go-rounds, and the rare, but awesome, swinging gate. Even an old-fashioned tire swing can be hazardous. Ask my friend Joan who I accidentally kicked in the head with my foot (in a plaster cast) thanks to centripetal force. Or is it centrifugal?

2. Knives. Yep. My dad gave me a jacknife when I was around 10. You never know when you might want to take up whittling! We also made knives out of popsicle sticks. Not quite as menacing, but still dangerous.

3. Lawn Darts. We didn't have the official name brand "Jarts," but ours were just as deadly.

4. Klackers. Also called Kick-Klacks. Two heavy plastic balls connected by strings, which you would clack together. They were banned at my school and there was a rumor that one of the playground monitors took all the confiscated ones home and gave them to her son.

5. Cap guns. I don't think itwas actual gun powder sandwiched between two layers of paper--but caps and cap guns just seemed dangerous, and therefore extra cool. For extra danger--we smashed whole rolls of caps at once with a big rock.

6. Creepy Crawlers and Thingmakers. Playing with this contraption involved pouring plastic goop into a metal mold. When the molten plastic cooled, you used a sharp knife to cut off the extraneous plastic and wound up with a toy of some sort--a monster, insect, or even a family of Creeple People. I never had one of these....but that was probably not because they were unsafe--they were just too expensive.